20 years....

Scott Pollak · 07-03-2009, 08:24 AM

20 years ago this weekend my fiance' and I were in New York, about to get married somewhat on the sly.

It was the second marriage for both of us, no kids from either previous marriage (and no plans to have any!). Our families knew we were going to get married, but they thought we were going to do it in a small ceremony on the lake at her parent's house. We decided to elope instead.

Sunday, July 5th, will be our 20th anniversary. We had hoped to get married on July 4th (what a great day to LOSE your independence, eh?) but the Brooklyn County courthouse was closed.

I have no doubt I'll spend the rest of my life with this lady who is my best friend. Has it been easy for us? Hardly. Financial duress, two unexpected kids (and thank God we have 'em), some pretty bad career decisions, health issues (especially for my wife) and other things.

But I love her more today than the day I met her. I married my best friend, someone who I WANT to spend time with when we're together. Someone who shares my faith and beliefs, someone with whom I'm in sync enough that we're not polar opposites although we certainly don't agree on everything. How boring would that be?!

For those of you out there who maybe have been thru a divorce or are still looking, I hope and pray you find the same soul-mate I was blessed enough to find. If you ARE divorced (as we were) learn from whatever mistakes you may have made that contributed to the breakup of your previous marriage (mine was selfishness). Have hope with the realization that there could quite possibly be the right person out there for you despite a failed relationship.

Take the "til death do we part" part seriously. There were a LOT of times my wife and I both wanted to walk away from the other one, with good reason, but we committed to this, and I'm glad we did.

Today we still have our issues (we had a huge fight last week!), but we work thru it, talk it out, communicate, get outside help when needed, and we move on. As a consequence we've built a relationship filled with memories and family that we'll have forever. And in a few weeks we'll head out on our first cruise to celebrate.

Just wanted to celebrate a little something about the love of my life with some other people I've grown to love... you guys. Thanks for allowing me to do so.

Pat Sweeney · 07-03-2009, 01:06 PM

Scott, congratulations on your 20th, I hope you have a wonderful cruise to celebrate. Nothing in life is easy and that certainly includes marriages. It's something that you constantly need to work at and not take for granted, but I agree communication is a critical element in any relationship. My wife and I will be celebrating our 10th in September. Happy 20th Anniversary!!!!!

John Bigl · 07-03-2009, 06:41 PM

Happy Anniversary, Scott !!!

"The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not to twist them to fit our own image. Otherwise we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them" -- Thomas Merton

yup, sounds like you two love each other ....

Lori Furth · 07-03-2009, 08:12 PM

Scott,

What a lovely story...you sound like one lucky guy, and she a lucky woman!!

Hubby and I eloped more than thirteen years ago!

Happy In-Dependence Day to you both!

chucktaylor · 07-03-2009, 11:01 PM

Happy 20th Scott!

My wife and I have only been married 8 years coming up on July 14th and we have one rule on fighting I'll share with you. Fight Naked! (It's hard to stay mad at someone when they're naked!!!!)

Chuck

bransom · 07-04-2009, 08:56 AM

Happy anniversary, Scott!

My wife and I eloped on New Year's Eve 26 years ago.

Hope you both have a great day!

John Zadikian · 07-04-2009, 09:26 PM

What a great story, Scott, and we love ya right back! I was never blessed with a wife and kids, so I always like to read about how well others did in that part of their lives.

Happy 4th, and 5th, to you and everyone!

Jodi Krangle · 07-05-2009, 07:56 AM

Congratulations, Scott! That's really wonderful. :) My husband and I will have been married 19 years come this August. I totally understand what you're talking about.

We don't have huge arguments very often, but we're so used to one another - and we genuinely *like* one another so much - that if one *does* happen, after we calm down a little, we end up laughing about it (sometimes even before the argument is entirely finished).

I'm REALLY glad you've found the kind of happiness that lasts. Congratulations and hugs to you both.

spartacus · 07-05-2009, 05:26 PM

Very nice Scott, Very nice.

speechlady · 07-05-2009, 09:39 PM

Warmest Congratulations to you both!!

07-03-2009, 08:24 AM	#1 (permalink)
Scott Pollak Warm, Real, Natural Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Atlanta, Georgia Posts: 1,888	20 years.... 20 years ago this weekend my fiance' and I were in New York, about to get married somewhat on the sly. It was the second marriage for both of us, no kids from either previous marriage (and no plans to have any!). Our families knew we were going to get married, but they thought we were going to do it in a small ceremony on the lake at her parent's house. We decided to elope instead. Sunday, July 5th, will be our 20th anniversary. We had hoped to get married on July 4th (what a great day to LOSE your independence, eh?) but the Brooklyn County courthouse was closed. I have no doubt I'll spend the rest of my life with this lady who is my best friend. Has it been easy for us? Hardly. Financial duress, two unexpected kids (and thank God we have 'em), some pretty bad career decisions, health issues (especially for my wife) and other things. But I love her more today than the day I met her. I married my best friend, someone who I WANT to spend time with when we're together. Someone who shares my faith and beliefs, someone with whom I'm in sync enough that we're not polar opposites although we certainly don't agree on everything. How boring would that be?! For those of you out there who maybe have been thru a divorce or are still looking, I hope and pray you find the same soul-mate I was blessed enough to find. If you ARE divorced (as we were) learn from whatever mistakes you may have made that contributed to the breakup of your previous marriage (mine was selfishness). Have hope with the realization that there could quite possibly be the right person out there for you despite a failed relationship. Take the "til death do we part" part seriously. There were a LOT of times my wife and I both wanted to walk away from the other one, with good reason, but we committed to this, and I'm glad we did. Today we still have our issues (we had a huge fight last week!), but we work thru it, talk it out, communicate, get outside help when needed, and we move on. As a consequence we've built a relationship filled with memories and family that we'll have forever. And in a few weeks we'll head out on our first cruise to celebrate. Just wanted to celebrate a little something about the love of my life with some other people I've grown to love... you guys. Thanks for allowing me to do so. __________________ Scott R. Pollak Warm, Real, Natural... The Voice of NPR Atlanta www.voicebyscott.com

07-03-2009, 06:41 PM	#3 (permalink)
John Bigl ancora imparo Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: the puckerbrush of new hampshire, usa Posts: 654	Happy Anniversary, Scott !!! "The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not to twist them to fit our own image. Otherwise we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them" -- Thomas Merton yup, sounds like you two love each other .... __________________ "the woods would be very silent if no birds sang except those that sang best"

07-03-2009, 08:12 PM	#4 (permalink)
Lori Furth The Spot-on Voice! Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Los Angeles, CA Posts: 200	Scott, What a lovely story...you sound like one lucky guy, and she a lucky woman!! Hubby and I eloped more than thirteen years ago! Happy In-Dependence Day to you both! __________________ Lori Furth The Spot-On Voice http://www.lorifurth.com Savoa Member #08020

07-03-2009, 11:01 PM	#5 (permalink)
chucktaylor Super Moderator Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Ft. Worth, TX Posts: 558	Happy 20th Scott! My wife and I have only been married 8 years coming up on July 14th and we have one rule on fighting I'll share with you. Fight Naked! (It's hard to stay mad at someone when they're naked!!!!) Chuck __________________ Chuck Taylor *Taylor Made Productions* "For audio that fits like a shoe!" chuck.taylor@texascountdown.com

07-04-2009, 08:56 AM	#6 (permalink)
bransom User Join Date: Nov 2008 Posts: 39	Happy anniversary, Scott! My wife and I eloped on New Year's Eve 26 years ago. Hope you both have a great day! __________________ Bob Ransom www.bobransomvo.com

07-03-2009, 01:06 PM	#2 (permalink)
Pat Sweeney User Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada Posts: 143	Scott, congratulations on your 20th, I hope you have a wonderful cruise to celebrate. Nothing in life is easy and that certainly includes marriages. It's something that you constantly need to work at and not take for granted, but I agree communication is a critical element in any relationship. My wife and I will be celebrating our 10th in September. Happy 20th Anniversary!!!!!

07-04-2009, 09:26 PM	#7 (permalink)
John Zadikian Chiming in from Motown Join Date: Jul 2008 Posts: 320	What a great story, Scott, and we love ya right back! I was never blessed with a wife and kids, so I always like to read about how well others did in that part of their lives. Happy 4th, and 5th, to you and everyone! __________________ John Zadikian \| On Air - On Hold - Online "Don't Pick Just Any Voice...Make A Sound Choice" www.facebook.com/jzvoice www.linkedin.com/in/zadikian www.voice123.com/johnzadikian

07-05-2009, 07:56 AM	#8 (permalink)
Jodi Krangle Voice Overs & Vocals Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Greater Toronto Area, Canada Posts: 1,622	Congratulations, Scott! That's really wonderful. :) My husband and I will have been married 19 years come this August. I totally understand what you're talking about. We don't have huge arguments very often, but we're so used to one another - and we genuinely like one another so much - that if one does happen, after we calm down a little, we end up laughing about it (sometimes even before the argument is entirely finished). I'm REALLY glad you've found the kind of happiness that lasts. Congratulations and hugs to you both. __________________ Piece of Cake Voice Overs and Vocals SaVoa #08018 - www.savoa.org My Voices.com Profile My Songwriting Resource, The Muse's Muse

07-05-2009, 05:26 PM	#9 (permalink)
spartacus User Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Los Angeles Posts: 402	Very nice Scott, Very nice.

07-05-2009, 09:39 PM	#10 (permalink)
speechlady User Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Ma Posts: 81	Warmest Congratulations to you both!!

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