First Commercial Demo

[MarkCSmith]

So this is my first attempt at a demo. I'm having fun with it so far, I've tried out a couple things. It's two commercials sandwiching a parody TV teaser. I know the commercials, characters, etc should be on seperate demos. I'm curious if I'm going in the right direction at all. Again, this is my first demo so I'm not expecting it to be a hit, be as honest as you want. Thanks in advance for all your thoughts!

[Mike Sommer]

Your CSI Kentucky has given me an idea.

Okay, honestly -I don't want to take away from your fun, cuz that's what's it's all about- but there are a lot of rough edges here. If you're going to pursue this business you are going need some VO coaching.

In the "cell-tech" spot I get the sense that you are trying to project a perceived image of what you think you should sound like or are trying to imitate a bigger voice that you don't have, when you should be sounding like Mark Smith. Because when you try to sound like someone else, you don't sound real, and if you don't sound real no one will believe you and therefor won't want to buy the product or service.

Start looking for scrips (check out the Newbie section for some links) that have some real content, not just a few lines. Read the scrips for time, and make them sound conversational and less like an announcer.

Get some Voice Over books, James Alburger's The Art of Voice Acting is a good first start.

Listen to commercials and mimic the tone and feeling (not necessarily the voice).

Lastly don't be in a rush to put together a demo, there is a lot to learn and understand in this biz.

I'm sure others will have other great advice.

[JoeActor]

Hey Mark - Welcome.

If you have a chance, please post an introduction in the Welcome area. It's easier to give advice if we know a bit more about your background and goals in VO.

I have to agree with Mike. I hear some fun, and a desire to do VO, but you've got a bit of work ahead before it's demo time. The following thread has some good advice for those just starting out:
http://www.voice-overs.com/forum/newbie-board/1342-random-thoughts-newbies.html

Take a look around. Study. Ask questions. Maybe try posting some dry-voice auditions in the latest "Now Hear This" in Leads and Reads.

Oh, and "accessories" has a hard-K sound in it ;-)

Nice to meet you,
Joe J Thomas
www.JoeActor.com (http://www.JoeActor.com)
www.SoundsGoodToYou.com (http://www.SoundsGoodToYou.com)

[shenecke]

Welcome Mark, check out my thread in the newbie area: voice over guide. It's very informational. There are also practice scripts on that site as well, 3,500 of them!

[MarkCSmith]

Thanks guys, I recorded a bunch of stuff when I stumbled on some voiceover pitch sites (errr not sure if that's what you call them? voices.com, voices123.com, etc) and just thought to myself "Hey, this could be fun"

When I came to post this thread, I noticed the other demos posted and got a quick reality check :shocked: but I had it recorded anyways so figured why not toss it up! I definately have a ways to go but it's an industry I think I can be a part of given the right steps.

[JoeActor]

Thanks guys, I recorded a bunch of stuff when I stumbled on some voiceover pitch sites (errr not sure if that's what you call them? voices.com, voices123.com, etc) and just thought to myself "Hey, this could be fun"

When I came to post this thread, I noticed the other demos posted and got a quick reality check :shocked: but I had it recorded anyways so figured why not toss it up! I definately have a ways to go but it's an industry I think I can be a part of given the right steps.

It's all good - best to learn in a place like this.

Enjoy the path to VO-ism!,
Joe

[Michael Murphy]

I am a newb as well, so don't be discouraged. Critique to me means an opportunity to improve. There are very good talents here that will be honest and it is the best way to be. I recently took a VO seminar and was told to take coaching before redoing my demo. I will keep trying! It's fun for me anyways!

[Phyllis K. Day]

So this is my first attempt at a demo. I'm having fun with it so far

Nothing wrong with having fun. :smile:

Beyond that, the question is, are you trying to get into the business? At the end of the day, voice work is all about and only about the listener. It's not about the voice. This is hard to do. You have to be willing to serve your listeners. This is a demo that was fun to do, it has a youthful exuberance but I didn't once see your real voice in this and it doesn't showcase in any way if you have the ability to communicate. Of course, there are ways to learn how to communicate and that includes acting classes and some personal reflections on what you want from this business and what you think about the listener.

Phyllis K.